This morning I woke up with the notion of somehow dismissing my MOPS (Mothers of preschoolers) meeting. I love that group, but I was in a “sucky” mood. The last thing I wanted to do is be around a group of women discussing anything. Instead, I wanted to sit and think of a crafty way to let my husband know how he needs to take his husbandry role a bit more serious! He was threading on thin ice… You see, although the past is a great predictor of the future, I honestly believed that I could tell him this in a calm manner and he would be appreciative of my “constructive criticism” (this time around). Why can’t husbands see that God blessed them with wise wives for a reason- to tell them how to navigate through life. We honestly only want what’s best for them.
Nonetheless, as luck would have it (or fate, rather), I had to bring something to this meeting so I needed to go. I went about getting ready with so much on my mind (uh-hum, my husband), and made it to the meeting. Lo and behold, I arrived only to find out that God had taken the liberty of discussing my situation, in great details, with our guest speaker.
Before I continue, Let me just tell you about a situation that occurred yesterday…
As, I wrote about in my Blog, “State of The Union”, we are struggling financially. As a result I went grocery shopping and somehow determined that I would make our groceries last two weeks. To do this, I spent about an hour organizing and dividing the groceries into two parts (week 1 and week 2). By the time I was done with everything, I barely had enough energy to take care of my baby and cook a full meal. So I picked an easy dinner that I thought my husband would enjoy (Since he bought and raved about it in the past). Well when Darling Husband (with sarcasm) got home, he looked at it and snuffed his nose at it. He later put it under the oven and began to cook an alternate dinner for himself. Really! Well, in as calm as a voice as I could, I asked him if the meal wasn’t good enough for him. To which he replied, “No”.
I need not go further. I was livid. He said that was not the brand he bought last time. He didn’t even taste it to see if he liked it! You know that was icing on the cake…
Fast forward to our meeting. The guest speaker (She was amazing, by the way), in her speech, outlined 7 things to do for your husband:
1) Submit. Show respect. Come under their leadership. ( That is so difficult when I do such a great job at running things! 🙂
2) Love him.
3) Pray for him. I am inconsistent with this. (However, I see that God truly honors the prayer of a wife for her husband. I have seen in several occasions how God speaks to my husband about a situation that I prayed about and released to Him.) She even stated that, ‘They probably had great mothers, but no one will pray for our husbands, as much as we will.
4) Be kind! Not everyone is kind. As a child of God we are to be kind to others. Your husband is your husband, but he is also your brother in Christ.
5) Forgive Him! To the extent we forgive, we will be forgiven. Go on and don’t bring it up. Pray about it in your own heart. And then she goes on to say…( as if God whispered in her ear at that moment to share this with me) Cook for your husbands! Plan ahead. Don’t just wing it. (Ha!) Be honest, so he knows what to expect. Ex: Honey, we are really busy this week. Count on me two nights a week. Can we have peanut butter and jelly two nights out of this week?”
(Seriously, can you expect me to believe God didn’t speak with her first about this. As a matter of fact, I’m convinced he brought her there to talk to me! I could even see her glancing, inconspicuously, at me as she spoke.)
6)Make them a priority. Put it on your calendar to spend time daily with your husband. Even if its for 15 mins. The kids should know that you both are off limits during this time. Establishing that Mom and Dad are a unit and have boundaries, to protect their unit, makes the children feel safe and secure.
7) Have daily devotions. Tell God: I love you, I need you and I can’t make it through the day without you. God knows you are busy. He doesn’t expect you to go to the highways and byways. Sometimes all you can do is reinforce God’s love for you that day. God extends his grace to us…
Needless to say, I am happy I went to the meeting. My prayer is for God to take my anger and frustration, so that I can accept and implement these tips in my relationship with my Hubby.
Now if I could just get her to outline 7-10 steps for my husband…
With this I must bid farewell, for there is a meal in the kitchen waiting to be thoughtfully prepared…